=[ My mum said their is definitely no way she can lend me some money so I think its a very sad no for D'espa at London *sob*

But I guess this means I have free money now for new clothes, merch and maybe some new piercings that I wanted. I'll just have to have twice as much fun at Birmingham to make up for London!

Anyway though I am realllllyyy getting excited!!!! 8 Days to go =D

To Manchester for a week and abit! *sigh* I am gonna enjoy getting out the house for a while because Mum has been so paranoid and overprotective since my little sis went into hospital......but atleast she is taking her full dosage of tablets now like she should have been when my sister was taken into hospital...it might have stopped her getting so bloody ill.

Only just got home from the hospital about an hourish ago and I am not feeling pretty. I only got a few minutes sleep last night so I'm probs gonna have a nap today.

The only good thing about yesterday was seeing Keita and watching the movie, after I got home it all went downhill =[

This is horrible but I needed to express my feelings somehow.

I think that was possibly the worst hour of my life to date and.....I don't think I can listen to a Dir en grey song again for a long time, it only reminds me of her.

I wanted to be numb and untouched but the coffin was so small that all I could think was that it reminded me of a child's and that made me start crying. I was mentioned in the speech she wrote and she thanked me for taking her to see Dir en grey before she was hospitalized.......we promised eachother that we would go see them again when she was better......

I just want curl up and forget about it all....it hurts so much more than I thought.

I don't want to say goodbye to her, I want her back.

How in the world did I not notice Star Ocean had been released! OMFG I've been waiting for that game so long and yet I flippin forgot about it D< Now I have to go trade in loads of my games so I can afford it @.@

Yay definitely going to D'espairsRay in Birmingham now, just bought my ticket =D

Now I just have to find the money for train etc.......I'm not gonna bother getting a hotel for after this time though, its a waste of money that could be used for merch =P I don't really mind waiting several hours for a train

(sometimes I really really hate living in the country)

I'm so glad I went to girugamesh! Its like reignited my love jrock again =D Cuz I was in a kinda rut and was not liking any new music or feeling excited about much in particular.

Now its like wow, loving so much atm *sigh* its amazing how four men you have never even met can totally change how your feeling! Oh and omfg when they played evolution I loved how everyone got really into it! =D

( Anyho pictures! )

How the hell does a supposedly purple hair dye make my bleached bits of hair frickin pinky red D< If I wanted red I would have bought a red dye, not purple!

Goodlord all I wanted was the random blond hair I had showing at my roots to be purple so I didnt look like a multicoloured spaz at my uncles wedding but it went red and looked weird so then I had to try to salvage it and make it all red just so I didnt look disgusting >.>

GRRRRR I HATE IT

I've now decided, no more dyeing  for me for along time! It never goes how I want =_=

I almost died of shock today when I went into waterstones and saw....dun dun dun Gothic & Lolita Bible?!?!?! I think Lincoln's Waterstones went up a notch in my eyes but only a little cuz the chav filled area still scares me =P

I'm still unsure of what to do about giruga, luckily I dont have any lessons on friday so I could camp out then. But I've never done it before and I'm kinda a coward lol. I'm sad that I have a exam just a few days after (monday) so I'm gonna be worrying about that all weekend and rocking out instead of revising like I should be XD